When I Said “I Do”
It is Sunday morning, and I am writing from my desktop. The babies had an extremely rough morning, therefore, I fed and laid them down for their morning naps. While they are sleeping, I have the opportunity to write! Not sure how much I can get done, but hey, I will give it all I got!
I have been anticipating this particular blog. Many of you have requested to hear our love story. How we met, how long we dated, all the details in between. Well, today is the day!!! I want to take you on a short journey of something so precious to my heart, that God ordained and called forth before the very foundation of the earth. He created me for Robert, Robert for me, and NOTHING could stop this plan. God knew that we were created and destined to be a team. In Robert, I have learned so much about myself, about the Lord, about life. I am better because of this man. Today, I dedicate this particular writing to the love of my life. He is my everything. I pray our story, brings hope to you as the reader. Because although, we were destined to be together, we faced many obstacles.
Open your ears, open your hearts, and your eyes… as I take you down the path that we personally walked, individually, and together.
And to this… I say…God is good.
Some of you may know my background.. my journey of brokenness that led to my life now.
Growing up, I had a beautiful life, yet in the midst of hardships, trials, that I faced, many voids were formed within my heart, and I longed for anyone, just any one person to fill.
At age 14, a boy came into my life… and I figured this could be IT. The thing, the person that could help fix all the pieces of my life, and put it all back together. Side note- no human being can fix another. I learned this the hard way.
After 3 years, a whirl wind of a relationship, I found myself more scattered, shattered, and desperate for healing.
At this point, I needed change. I needed to move out of my hometown, and start over, start fresh.
A friend of mine, begged me to move out to Dallas, and live with her for the summer. Every one in my life that cared for me, knew how desperately I needed to escape the current position I was in. I went out to visit her, scope out the city, and see what life would look like for me if I chose to pursue this route. In the meantime, she began to tell me about this guy she wanted to introduce me to, however, the thought of being in another relationship was too much for me to bare. I couldn’t stomach being with another man. I was currently so wounded, and in a state of being extremely fragile, I knew this wouldn’t be the answer. However, after the visit, I fell in love with Dallas, and knew this was where I wanted to move asap!
In the meantime, of packing up everything I owned, I found out I was pregnant. Every dream and plan I had to move to Dallas and start over, was now down the drain. I unpacked everything, and started a different journey. Plans that consisted of how to provide, how to properly raise a newborn baby, while still searching for who I was as a 17 year old shattered girl. I started cosmetology school, worked as a server for a local restaurant, and continued life as I had always known it. I didn’t know what the future held, but I knew that it wasn’t playing out the way I had envisioned it when I was younger.
I tried to make things work between the father of my child, and myself, but there were too many things that worked against me in order to make it happen.
Eventually, 32 weeks into the pregnancy, I went into labor, and long story short, I gave birth to my stillborn baby boy, Micah…my little love who saved my life. At the time, I didn’t even realize it, yet now as an older woman, I see it clear as day. It was hard to see passed my pain… yet grace and the love of Jesus always has a way of doing things beyond ourselves. After a season of grief, I started over again. Starting over, meant packing up everything I owned, once again, and moving to Dallas, TX to pursue every hearts desire. If I could have put my heart on a platter, it would have looked like, dreams of pursuing worship, and going to college, being a part of ministry, and simply discovering Jesus and who He was for Taylor.
I enrolled at Christ for the Nations. A new life was at my finger tips. I did not know what was about to happen, but I didn’t care. I just knew I needed something fresh! Sometimes, in order to be free from a situation, God will call you to leave the current place you are in. Its not that you are running from it, its sometimes necessary to remove yourself from the very thing that will soon destroy you.
Prior to this big change, I was drowning… drowning in sin, immersed in the pain of my past, dying a slow spiritual death. This move was necessary in order to free me from the very things that held me bound for years and years.
I began to meet new people, see new faces. I was known as the southern girl from Arkansas on campus. I have always been an open book, and for some reason, it was one of the first questions always asked, as I walked the campus streets. “What is your story?’ I began to open up and share who I was, and what I recently came out of… the wounds were still fresh, but I was finding a little more healing and freedom, every single time I shared. Before I knew it, I was asked to share my story on a video to the Tuesday Night experience on campus. It was an open service to the city. Any one and every one was invited to come encounter Jesus. The video consisted of a student, simply sharing their story of who and where they once were, and what God had done in their lives.
I was so honored to share…and excited to see how God was going to use the pain of my past to impact others.
THIS IS WHERE THE STORY GETS REALLY GOOD.
Every Tuesday night experience, CFNI would bring in a guest speaker. On this particular night, they had a last minute cancellation from the guest speaker, and was in a panic to find someone else. The worship leader at the time, mentioned Roberts name. “Have you heard of Robert Madu…? You should have him come.” They contacted Robert, he confirmed, and on this particular night, He was the man assigned to bring the word! In the mean time, all of the confessional videos are pre recorded at the beginning of the semester. The director of the school would go in each week, and pick out which one he wanted to play that particular night. On this night, as he watched through different videos, he came across mine, and said “THIS is the one I want to be played tonight!’
So on this night, Robert wasn’t supposed to be the speaker, but because of the cancellation, he was chosen to be there.
Out of tons of videos, my video was the one chosen to be played the night Robert was there.
This was the beginning of our love story, little did we know….(How SWEET and GOOD is God) Oh if we could only trust Him with the tiny details of our lives. He is in EVERY DETAIL. I know this full well.
This was a big night for me to be so vulnerable to the public. It was my first time ever sharing. I invited some of my close friends and family to support me. This night was bound to be pretty emotional. You must know, one friend that came to support me, was my friend who I was going to live with before the pregnancy. She was always like a big sister– Becca Henderson at the time. Shout out to her 😉
That night, my video was played, and Robert spoke. Our destinies were colliding.
When He got up to speak, Becca leaned over and said… “Oh my goodness.. that is Robert… he is the guy I was wanting to set you up with a while ago…”
Of course, from that moment on, I leaned in a little bit more than normal.
He spoke, and carried something so special, a unique anointing and ability to bring the word of God to life. Not to fail to mention, he was so so so very fine. FOIN. I mean… I was like…dang, I didn’t even know a man like this existed. But that is where it stopped. We didn’t meet that night… life went about its business, and I never really thought anything passed that night.
At this time, Robert was a student at Southwestern Assemblies of God. My friend, Becca, worked on campus, and Robert would go visit her every now and then. The next day, after Tuesday night experience, he happened to stop by her office. They began to chat like any other day, and she said “Hey did you see the girl on the video last night when you were at CFNI?” Robert responded, “the country girl?” Becca — “YES! I have been wanting y’all to meet!!!’
This day was the beginning of a little spark that was birthed.
Randomly, one day, I received a myspace friend request from a guy named Robert Madu. Of course, I accepted…and there, we started having conversations.
I was currently employed as a sales associate at Express. One day as I am adjusting clothes on a rack, I see Robert peaking through another rack, watching me. LOLOL! This is too good! I immediately internally freak out.. out of excitement of course! This hottie of a guy, came in to scope me out!! We realized we saw each other, and started our first face to face conversation.
Time went on…We eventually had a group date to iHop. LOLOL!
I was so dang nervous, I couldn’t even think to talk. (Robert and I laugh about this to the day.) I was so out of my comfort zone, it portrayed me as a different person! So I would say, our first group date, didn’t go as planned, but hey, it didn’t stop there!
February 14, Valentines Day of 2007, I receive roses on my dorm doorstep. They were the first roses I had ever received from a guy. We went on our very first one on one date that evening. Oh was I smitten.
Our journey continued… and we dated 6 YEARS on and off. Yeah you read right — 6 YEARS PEOPLE!
Needless to say, although God had ordained us to be together, there was a lot of “fixing” and healing that needed to take place before we could become ONE. Within the 6 years, I learned many things about myself. Being in a relationship will bring to surface personal wounds you didn’t realize were there. Robert and I both had some growing up to do… but in the midst of the back and forth, the waiting, drama, heartbreak, I always knew he was my husband, and was willing to be perfected, and willing to be patient with him, because he was my prize at the end of it all.
To say, he was worth the wait, is an understatement. He is my love. Every day passing by, I learn and see just how perfect we are for each other. We were destined to be together… and what God has brought together, no man can stop it!
Grateful for God shutting doors, for rejection…at the time it didn’t feel so good… but now, I am forever thankful. Sometimes, we think we know what we need… but trust me, God knows what we need more than what we think we need.
We said I DO, August 24, 2012.
This day literally goes down as one of the GREATEST days of my life. A day of Redemption, joy, greatness unfolding.
I wanted to share with you some of our photos from the day. I pray my story brings hope to the hopeless faint heart, who feels forgotten by God. Submit the things to Him that you know you shouldn’t have in the first place. Allow Him to work and do what only HE can do.
HE IS ABLE TO DO EXCEEDINGLY , ABUNDANTLY, ABOVE ALL THAT WE ASK….
Surrender is the key.
Awe…we were so happy to see each other!
The Wedding Party
This was one of my fav things about the wedding! Outside of the theater, we had giant posters in the glass, that usually holds what show is being played for the evening!
My sweet Daddy, who I love and adore!
Clearly I was extremely emotional. lololol!
I loved this dance!
Momma and Son dance… I love this picture!
Red Velvet for the groom cake
Party Favors were m&m’s with our faces on it 😉
My 80 year old Mimi, work work work work work work’n the dance floor!
Watch the Sneak Peak Video of our Wedding Ceremony!!!! Still brings me to tears 4 years later!!
And we literally danced the night away!! Still to this day– the best Party, dance floor, DAY, I have ever been a part of!!!
Thank you to my husband for loving me unconditionally, accepting me, flaws and all… For representing Jesus in so many ways, for being the most incredible Father… and completing me in ways I didn’t know you could.
Cheers to a long life ahead together.
We’ve only just begun.